derring-do

Hello clearly I don't understand Tumblr

1 note

Screaming in Night

Fireworks

A group of teenagers walk by and drop some smoking thing on the ground.

It gives one waist-high orgasm of sparks and smoke, then dies.

Later, explosions and sirens pull through the night.

Sirens and real fireworks screaming in equal measure.

Screaming for pain and the abolition of fear

A bright eyed flare to God

Maybe it will wake him up

Maybe this time he’ll pay attention

Filed under fireworks poem poetry

0 notes

In the Boardroom

Voice 1:
This deal will help us attract the youth demographic.
Voice 2:
A desirable segment of the market population.
Voice 1:
Now think! We need to offer them means to create!
Voice 2:
What?
Voice 1:
This Tumblr thing tested 98.2% positive ABC matrix with the words creativity and freedom.
Voice 2:
Damn it.
Voice 1:
I know.
Voice 2:
What about an online paint app? They could draw things and save them.
Voice 1:
That's a start, that's a start. What about a sound board? We could get sound clips from Bieber or Swift, and they could do their own mix ups.
Voice 2:
Sure. That sounds good, whatever it is. And what about Flickr?
Voice 1:
What about it?
Voice 2:
We could integrate it in! The kids could earn badges for photo achievements!
Voice 1:
Not bad, not bad. Listen, we'd better order in some sushi and Perrier. This could be a long night.

Filed under yahoo

5 notes

Welcome Yahoo Overlords

I was getting tired of not being censored, and having a cool site to play on.

I’m sure the Yahoo touch will soon fill my view with ads and links to ads. Fantastic! Maybe even ads for Yahoo Mail! Or for Flickr! Which was once a cool site itself!

Innovation! Am I right, guys? The hallmark of Yahoo and their tech!

And family friendliness! No more porn, or bad words anywhere! The tender youth of the Internet can’t deal with it.

Oh! And let’s not forget the upcoming forcing of Yahoo IDs on everyone for great justice and security!

Wow! A brave new world!

Welcome, Yahoo Overlords!

Filed under yahoo

4 notes

ambletrees:

we are nowhere and the time is

right because we haven’t checked

our iPhones once & we only got

heckled twice for holding hands

on this beach, but those guys

were really drunk so maybe they

didn’t even mean it.

but, if you do choose to cry about

how helpless you feel in places like

this, i’ll wash the sand from my

shirt with your tears

so that it’s not in vain.

1 note

A Better Life Through Science

Botox is just the tip of the youth iceberg
Gentle chemicals in your soup
Will stimulate your intestines to higher action
A shampoo that regrows hair anywhere
And we mean anywhere (wink)
A cheese that fights arterial plaque
Underwear that keep your naughty bits
In perpetual fighting trim
Eye drops to give you perfect vision, telescopic vision, X-ray vision

Sure, you’ll be living forever
On a stinking planet
Filled with rude, violent hairy apes
Fighting for food and water
But science already has a solution
For that little problem

Filed under science poem poetry

38 notes

fuckyeahgreatplays:

secretsinrectangles:

In 1948, five Broadway show girls participated in a “Spaghetti Swooshing” contest. They had to eat a plate of spaghetti and sauce without using their hands.

Why yes, this is my second spaghetti-related theater post this week.

fuckyeahgreatplays:

secretsinrectangles:

In 1948, five Broadway show girls participated in a “Spaghetti Swooshing” contest. They had to eat a plate of spaghetti and sauce without using their hands.

Why yes, this is my second spaghetti-related theater post this week.