1. Sushi was invented in Japan. Dorian Nakamoto is Japanese.
2. Sushi was invented at least fifty years ago. Dorian Nakamoto is about fifty.
3. It would be really hard to gather and present evidence of who the real inventor of sushi is, but points 1 and 2 are pretty suggestive.
At this point in our technological evolution, to read a novel is to engage in probably the second-largest single act of pleasure-based data transfer that can take place between two human beings, exceeded only by sex.
Sorry to be so blunt, but phew wowie! Are you ever obese!
It’s affecting your life. School children making obscene gestures behind your big old butt. Sexual partners suddenly moving to celibacy in the Alps. Your boss telling you fatties don’t get promoted.
You want to lose weight, but haven’t had the proper tools up to now. Like a caulking gun full of super glue for your lips. But don’t worry, now there is a system that can help you lose weight quickly and effectively.
As you can see from my white coat which says PROPERTY OF A SCIENTIST on the front pocket, I dress pretty sharp, which means everything I tell you is true. And what I’m telling you is that you do not need gastric bypass surgery or even super glue on your lips, when you have the RioSystem of weight control.
The RioSystem is a simple, easy, harmless system. Once a week, you take a RioPill and twenty gallons of water. You then hook up the RioIV to your arm and rush to the bedroom, before the induced coma sets in. (Many of our users like to make sure they are in the bedroom before they start!)
In the week of not moving or eating, tne RioIV provides a steady stream of nutrients to you, with enough calories to support life. The RioDiapers fill up and absorb, and the RioFresh squirts disinfectant everywhere. It comes in either Mountain Pine or Pina Colada scents.
At the end of the week, you wake up, remove the RioIV from your arm, and go weigh yourself. (Many of our users who experience minor nausea like to wait until they throw up before the weigh-in!) We guarantee you will be amazed at the results!
Simply carry on with this program for six months and, if you have not lost at least five pounds, we will send you your very own PROPERTY OF A SCIENTIST white coat.
Why hold yourself back? Discover the skeletal you with RioSystem!
I am going to grow a beard down to my knees, start wearing camo and get me a 15 year old wife.
I am going to run for political office, then never do any work in it while sending dick pics to ladies and smoking crack cocaine in a drunken stupor. When I’m caught, I will blame hackers and the media, then confess six months later with the now standard politician apology, “I’m sorry if my lifestyle of being myself offended someone.”
Realising that hope and love are useless, I’m going to start figuring out peoples’ biggest fears, like death, and the person not from your tribe, and stick my finger in them and push until the voters scream “Enough!” and put me in office.
But don’t worry. After that happens, I plan to do the minimal amount of work needed to feather my nest before the next election. So probably no dumb laws will be proposed by me.